It’s definitely going to suck

About 18 months ago, Mr. D. got an interview for a job he was very excited about. The interview went well, his candidacy progressed, and at some point we discussed the strong likelihood that he’d have to move for this awesome job before I could come with him. And we both agreed that the tradeoffs were worth it — after all, a few months apart is not such a big deal when you’re talking about a career-making job.

Back then, we were thinking we could be living apart for as many as six or eight months — quite a long time! That hypothetical separation didn’t seem undoable at all — a blip, really, one that would be over before we even realized it.

But now the hypothetical has become real and it’s rapidly approaching. We won’t be apart for anywhere near as long as we feared — nine weeks at the outside — but I’ll admit that I am not doing well with it. Somehow nine weeks apart seems like an eternity. We’ve spent up to two weeks apart in the past — though even the two-week trip I’m thinking of preceded our wedding — but nine weeks? That’s, like, forever! And my birthday is during those nine weeks!

I keep telling myself that the specter of time apart seems worse than it actually will be because I’ll also be doing all the packing and move preparation on this end by myself. That actually has a lot of truth to it: I hate moving a lot, and I hate it even more when I have to do all the packing myself, and when I actually have to pack because we’re going across the country and not across town.

But no matter what I tell myself (It’s only nine weeks! and The move makes it seem worse! and You’ll talk every day on Skype so it’ll be just like you’re both in the same room!) what I know is that it is actually going to suck. It will be nine long weeks, and the move will make it worse, and Skype is not going to make me think Mr. D. is in the room with me at all. I honestly don’t know how military families do this, with recurring year-plus deployments spent apart. All we’re looking at is nine weeks and I’m about to fall apart.

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